Thursday, July 12, 2007
A Little Survey
Lance and I have been having a discussion about past sexual encounters and we disagree about how many past partners are too many and what is a good number of partners for someone to have had. I would imagine that age plays a role in this question, but how many is too many? I tend to think that if you need to use your toes when adding up partners, you may have had too many. Sometimes I am embarrassed that I have not had more, but sometimes I am embarrassed at the ones I have had. I went to a party with a wild girl when I was 19 and I had just broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years. As we played pool in the family room, I had a few too many drinks (likely story) and ended up making out with a guy whose last name was Hanrahan. My drunk friend kept shouting, "You can't make out with him - he's a hammerhead shark!" Absolutely ridiculous I know, but we were young and it was late. It got awkward when Steve reached under my skirt and felt my pantyhose (give me a break, it was the 80's) and asked if I was wearing pantyhose. I was very embarrassed and I left while he went to get a rubber. I remember looking in my rear-view mirror and seeing him come out of the house with his jeans unzipped and looking puzzled. I have had so many near-misses like that - incidences that could have led me to bringing in a calculator to add up my partners - but something in the back of my mind kept me from being an extraordinarily promiscuous girl. Maybe it wasn't my mind, but my heart that kept me from making so many mistakes - and there is no doubt they would have been mistakes - maybe the guy I was meant to love would have looked at me differently if I had said my number was 35 or 40. I don't know, but that is the point, you never know. I could probably cut my number in half and be happier for it - in fact, I could probably cut my number to 2 and be where I need to be, but really, often the morons are adorable. So, what do you think, what is a good number and at what number do you think you should lie about your sexual conquests?
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2 comments:
This took me a little time to think about because one, there are so many answers, and two, there is no real answer at all. I do not think that you should ever have to lie about your sexual conquests. Consindering that this is a topic most often shared only with those close to you and doctors, you shouldn't have to lie about anything. For me personally, I believe that we, as thoughtful, educated individuals, are responsibel enough to make our own decisions, and I have faith that we make the right ones for us at the time. There will always, always, always be hindsight, but we must reflect that we the best with what we know in those moments, and we must trust that each decision was made for a reason. Are there boys in my past that make me giggle a little just thinking about how much I swooned only now to cringe? Absolutely. Even typing that has made me close my eyes and shake my head at some of the winners. But, in the time, the moments that I spent all night pressed close to them on the couch sharing secrets and becoming increasingly giddy everytime they'd touch my leg or lean a little closer. In the end, I don't truly regret any of them - each one had his place in time. So, I'm not sure a number could be applied, alothough I'd say you'd know when it got to extrememes and no one was special because you didn't even have time to learn their name you were going through partners so quickly. In a situation like that, when the your number spikes out of a sense of recklessness, then yes, maybe it would be time to rethik a few choices and scale back, but I'm relatively sure that none of us that is reading this or commenting has experienced that. We are far too thoughtful of creatures to act without any care.
My immediate reaction to your question was that it no one should lie about how many partners they have had or haven't had. I am comfortable with my number and I was upfront about it with Gerardo when we met. We were very open about our pasts and put it all behind us. To be completely truthful, I don't remember most of my past relationships. I can barely see faces in my mind or recall conversations. I believe I am with the man I am supposed to be with, and the rest really isn't important.
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